- By Ruth Davis Konigsberg

The Truth About Grief

  • Title: The Truth About Grief
  • Author: Ruth Davis Konigsberg
  • ISBN: null
  • Page: 251
  • Format: Hardcover
  • The Truth About Grief The five stages of grief are so deeply imbedded in our culture that no American can escape them Every time we experience loss a personal or national one we hear them recited denial anger bargaining

    The five stages of grief are so deeply imbedded in our culture that no American can escape them Every time we experience loss a personal or national one we hear them recited denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance The stages are invoked to explain everything from how we will recover from the death of a loved one to a sudden environmental catastrophe or toThe five stages of grief are so deeply imbedded in our culture that no American can escape them Every time we experience loss a personal or national one we hear them recited denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance The stages are invoked to explain everything from how we will recover from the death of a loved one to a sudden environmental catastrophe or to the trading away of a basketball star But the stunning fact is that there is no validity to the stages that were proposed by psychiatrist Elisabeth K bler Ross than forty years ago In The Truth About Grief, Ruth Davis Konigsberg shows how the five stages were based on no science but nonetheless became national myth She explains that current research paints a completely different picture of how we actually grieve It turns out people are pretty well programmed to get over loss Grieving should not be a strictly regimented process, she argues nor is the best remedy for pain always to examine it or express it at great length The strength of Konigsberg s message is its liberating force there is no manual to grieving you can do it freestyle In the course of clarifying our picture of grief, Konigsberg tells its history, revealing how social and cultural forces have shaped our approach to loss from the Gettysburg Address through 9 11 She examines how the American version of grief has spread to the rest of the world and contrasts it with the interpretations of other cultures like the Chinese, who focus on their bond with the deceased than on the emotional impact of bereavement Konigsberg also offers a close look at K bler Ross herself who she borrowed from to come up with her theory, and how she went from being a pioneering psychiatrist to a New Age healer who sought the guidance of two spirits named Salem and Pedro and declared that death did not exist Deeply researched and provocative, The Truth About Grief draws on history, culture, and science to upend our country s most entrenched beliefs about its most common experience.

    1 thought on “The Truth About Grief

    1. It is so refreshing to read a book about grief that finally says the five stages do not exist. I am so tired of hearing people tell someone about those stages when lose someone. This is a good book and more realistic and easier to relate to. The only flaw to this book is that it is a bit outdated to how people grieve now. A lot of the research and studies quoted are from years ago when the expectations on grief and grieving was different. Still this is a book worth reading.

    2. Konigsberg tries to present a case against the 5 stages of grief model of Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, but he does not produce a strong one. He has a few really good arguments, supported by research and clinical studies, but he fails to present a solid case AND the book is not so well written. Konigsberg clearly ignores contemporaty facts about positive and negative emotions and falls into the trap of "positivity", confusing resilience with health and longevity. For example, he states that positive em [...]

    3. I've read Kubler-Ross, which is referenced frequently in this book and found that Konigsberg provided a well thought out alternative to the well accepted stages of grief. The aspect I appreciated the most, was not that she felt that she was providing the "next best thing", or that the stages of grief were irrelevant, but Konigsberg presents the idea that there is more than one way for people to go through grief. We each have a unique experience, even though many of us have overlapping and simila [...]

    4. Basically the author tears apart the idea that grief comes in stages. I like the idea that it's not a specific set of experiences but that it's a different, individual process for everyone. The history of grief that was given was interesting. However I didn't like most of the examples given and I thought the writing style was dull which is why I only gave it 2 stars. The book did get me to think about my own grief though so I guess that's a good thing.

    5. a thinly-written jeremiad against the admittedly thinly-understood concept(s), experiences, of grief, loss, mourningree with the nonlinear nature of loss / grief, and support Science versus nebulous pseudo-scienceever, the book felt unnecessarily shrill. yes, all emotional experiences of humans can be exploited for profit and by unscrupulous persons.what is this book really adding to the conversation? not much, in my read.

    6. Ya gotta love behavioral scientists! Here I had bought right in to Kubler-Ross's stages of grief and I find out it's basically a lot of hogwash! Konigsberg is not a scientist, but she's a science writer, so she has ferreted out conflicting research studies. It goes to show that I, anyway, am too quick to accept "study" results without a healthy skepticism.

    7. Read the description, it says it all. This is a very good book. The author states "don't give someone a book about grief when they're grieving" her explanation is wonderful and true. She also looks at many other ethnic groups and how they grieve. Everyone has their own way.

    8. IF you thought you knew everything that you need to know about providing support to the dying and bereaved when you learned D-A-B-D-A, and your ready to risk learning about actual scientific studies in the field of bereavement care this is the one book you really should read.

    9. I liked this book but in terms of comparing it to the other books I read on grief. It is balance to the other books on grief out there. And can make you feel like less of a weirdo if you don't want grief counseling or feel as though you are doing better than expected after dealing with a loss.

    10. Answered questions I've had for years about delayed childhood grief and the offered a challenge to our popular notions about grief counselling.

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